Romney: A Personal Impression

In July of last year, I attended a book signing of Laura Ingraham’s. Ingraham spoke briefly about her book The Obama Diaries. A tanned and coifed Mitt Romney introduced her. Ingraham ribbed Romney for not having even one of his many hairs out of place. His tan, in particular, struck me, and at first I wondered why this was. It was not inexplicable; it was summer after all. Still, there are tans acquired naturally and there are tans acquired unnaturally, and I suspected his was of the latter type.

            When I think of Romney now, the image of an offensively tanned face looking out on about a hundred pale ones always comes back to me. In fairness, I did not verify that every face in the audience was pale, hesitant perhaps to sully the contrast by acknowledging audience members with countenances as bronzed as Romney’s. I tried listening to him, but gave up, fixating instead on his tan, his hair, and his body fitting black shirt. It was as if he had been sent through a planer, so smooth was he. I could not get past the note of artificiality in his whole ensemble; here was a middle aged man pretending he had discovered the fountain of youth.

            It is still uncertain what persona Mitt’s advisors will saddle him with for 2012. If the looser and tieless Mitt does not work, will they take his executive suits out of the closet once again? Or perhaps they will take severer action and have him abandon his granola for the fried food found at the county fairs he will be attending. If Mitt’s advisors told him imperiling his physique was his best shot at winning, I would expect him to adopt the diet of a possible foe, Chris Christie, who, no doubt, will have to decline many a free meal if he is to be taken seriously.